My #1 fear has always been what others think of me. Yep. More than snakes, more than spiders, the thought that someone might think ill about me truly paralyzed me from doing pretty much anything. I would always try to show up as the girl who didn’t give a sh*t and was always unbothered, however, I was very much bothered, to say the very least. I was constantly walking on eggshells, making sure I didn’t say or do the wrong thing and everyone around me thought I was a perfect person…
*gag*
Now thinking about the way I used to live my life and carry myself makes me cringe. By the way, if you are on a personal growth journey like we all should be, if you cringe at how you used to behave and speak, then you’re doing a good job at this personal growth thing. I mean, how egotistical could I be to think that I could control the whole world into thinking I was perfect. There is not one person I can think of that I believe is perfect so what makes me think that I could control what every single person that crossed my path thinks about me?! I know, more than anyone, my flaws and shortcomings. It is OKAY to have things to improve on.
So how did I go from an egotistical control freak to living my best, most authentic life? Release the fear of criticism. Ya, ya, ya. You hear this in every personal development book, podcast, you name it, but HOW do you actually release this BS once and for all?
- Journal. Write what you are actually afraid of? Don’t just stop at a short answer, keep digging deep into it. Let the words flow out of you without judgment. Was there something specific from childhood that made you feel like you have to keep everyone happy? Did you feel like you had to get all A’s, captain every sports team at your school and get into the best college to feel loved and accepted by your family?
- Take your power back. Decide who gets to criticize you. Sure, people can say whatever they want, but you have the power to let it consume you or bounce right off you. I had a talk with some girlfriends in the content creation space about “haters.” Most of us, after digging deeper, found we were telling stories that we have this whole group of people that hate us and laugh at us, but it was entirely made up in our heads as a protection mechanism to keep us small and “safe.” How ridiculous is that? Drop the mind games and step into your power.
- What you focus on grows. Focus on what you actually desire, instead of what you do not desire. These days, I focus on showing up as my most authentic self for the people who need it. When you are creating from a place of love, joy and authenticity, your content will fall into the right hands. I don’t know about you, but I can tell when someone isn’t being their most authentic self and it is pretty cringe
- You were born with a gift – you would be doing the entire world a disservice for not using it. It is true. Everyone on this planet was born with their own unique set of skills, way of thinking, style, personality, etc. Imagine if everyone was a carbon copy of each other. How boring would that be? If you have something on your heart that you desire to do, that means it is entirely possible and the Universe is nudging you to DO IT! The world needs what you have inside of you. Letting fear hold you back from changing the world for the better is silly.
So please, my friend, release these limiting beliefs and step into your incredible power! If you need someone to hype you up come on over to my Instagram. My DM’s are always open.
Love you,
KJ