In the years leading up to becoming a mother, I was truly living my best life. However, my life wasn’t always that way. It took me a lot of work (emphasis on A LOT) to get into that place of true peace within and fully stepping into my authentic self. This is why I absolutely REFUSED to lose myself in motherhood.
I have seen it with my own eyes growing up. The women who completely let themselves go when they become a mother. When I say this, I am not talking about their figure, although that seems to be a side effect more times than not. I am talking about truly losing themselves because all they do is put their families needs before their own. A lot of women wear their misery like a badge of honor. Some women literally don’t know who they are. I just see it as extremely sad and heartbreaking.
ALL women deserve to have a full cup, ESPECIALLY moms. Mothers are the ones raising the future. Our little ones are observing our every little move, how we talk to ourselves and the boundaries we set with our family.
I am a human, I am not perfect, and will surely pass down some not-so-great traits to my daughter and maybe even some things she will need to heal from, but I refuse to show her that I am a doormat to everyone else’s needs before my own. Think about it. If your child is watching you suffer to keep everyone else happy and they absolutely adore you and love you because that is what our beautiful babies do, guess what they are probably going to do when they grow up… shit to keep everyone else happy at their own expense!
Becoming a mother is hands down the most difficult life transition I have ever gone through. Just because I learned a lot of self love and personal development tools before I became a mother doesn’t mean I didn’t dodge the loneliness, the postpartum depression & anxiety, the sleepless nights or the arguments with my husband. I went through all the shit and I will continue to go through all the shit! However, I am dedicated to coming out stronger through all my struggles and I am committed to empowering you to do the same.
What has helped me:
1) Waking up before your child(ren)
Even if it’s just 10 minutes so I can ground myself and prepare my mind for what is to come, it makes a huge difference in my day. I do aim to have an hour so I can brush my teeth, drink some water, journal my thoughts, meditate and maybe hop in the shower if I’m lucky. When I do this it sets such a great tone for the day. You are worth going to sleep an hour early and waking up an hour early. You are the foundation of your family and if you are on edge, your family will feel that energy.
2) Workout for at least 10 minutes per day
I have found when I have a workout longer than 10 minutes planned it is so easy for me to say screw it and not do it. 10 minutes is nothing. A lot of times, especially the days when I am not feeling it the most and I push myself to get those 10 minutes in, I end up doing something else to continue my workout because it feels so good. Honestly, working out for me these days isn’t about staying in shape, even though it is a nice result, it’s mostly about my mental health.
3) Prioritize drinking 16-20oz of water AND eating breakfast before coffee
This has been huge for me. I feel like a lot of times as mothers we forget to do silly things like eat and drink (unless it’s coffee, because #momlife). However, you will find if you increase your water intake, you will actually have less brain fog and more energy. Also, eating a meal before drinking coffee will help your cortisol levels so you’re not getting that extreme anxious feeling that coffee can give a lot of us. Trust me, it’s very nice not feeling like an anxious mess when your momming all day.
Try to implement these strong but powerful shifts into your morning routine and watch your lift begin to shift.
What do you do to stay sane in motherhood? I’d love to hear in the comments.